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Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Lanolin? What Is This?
Uniformed TSA (Transportation Security Administration) Personnel: "What is this stuff?"
Uniformed TSA Personnel: "Where did it come from?"
Uniformed TSA Personnel (with a furrowed brow): -----
Swimmer: "Seriously, lanolin comes from the glands of sheep."
Uniformed TSA Personnel (studiously looking at the jar of lanolin): -----
Swimmer (meekly smiling): "We use it as an anti-chafing ointment when we swim...in the ocean or across channels..."
Uniformed TSA Personnel (quietly speaking into his security microphone): "Supervisor wanted. So, you swim with this?"
Swimmer (smiling widely): "Yes, we put it under our arms, around our necks and sometimes between our legs."
Uniformed TSA Personnel: "Has it been out of your possession on your trip?"
Swimmer: "Yes, while I was swimming, the jar was on the boat."
Uniformed TSA Personnel: [inaudible mumbled whisper into microphone] -----
Swimmer (with a worried look): "We use it so we don't chafe."
Uniformed TSA Personnel addressing supervisor in attendance: "He has this white stuff in his bag. He uses it between his legs and it comes from sheep. He left it on a boat and he uses it to...[addressing Swimmer]...what do you use it for again?"
Swimmer: "To prevent chafing. Rubbing. When we swim, we can rub our skin raw when our arms or legs rub against other body parts or swimsuits."
TSA Supervisor: "You mean like Vaseline? My friend is a triathlete, but this is no Vaseline."
Swimmer: "Yes, like Vaseline, but it is called lanolin. But is stays on longer and turns white after a while. It comes from sheep."
TSA Supervisor: "Sheep? So it keeps you warm?"
Swimmer: "Well no, but it keeps me from getting a big cut or wound on my neck."
TSA Supervisor: "Thank you. You can go now."
Copyright © 2012 by Open Water Source
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